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One Gay One Straight, 32 y.o.
Location: United States
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Date: December 11, 2022
I don't want some whirlwind move scenario. I posted this again cause the previous one got removed for some reason.
I was looking for some other perspectives and some of the comments here provided that (re: never leaving the honeymoon phase with my ex and romanticizing a fantasy that would've probably never come to fruition).
I understand the hate, and fully accept that I'm horrible for feeling the way I am, but was looking for people to point out something that I wasn't seeing in my clouded mind.
Most likely, yes. Hope that helps. Most people aren't on Tinder to make friends.
Oh yikes, seems like your personality is prob why you’re being rejected. A bitter man is one of the ugliest personality types, ruins the whole thing even if he is attractive.
If you want to use condoms, just say that, he has to use condoms, or no sex.
You two need a conversation about boundaries and expectations. Ask her if you spent as much time mentioning some girls name and your interactions with her, would she have an issue with that?
You might expect that intelligent people will act intelligently but defining intelligence depends a number of different factors, ie home environment, cultures, life experiences as well as being informed on world events. It is hot to apply your own template of intelligence on another. I know of people that are literally geniuses that have the social skills of a 5 year old. Everything is relative.
Talk to her. Don't use “you” in your sentences. Say things like “When this occurs, I feel this…” etc. You have to talk about your feelings as well as hers. Talk about expectations, what you each want in the relationship. Without a conversation, you will walk from this relationship right into a similar situation with someone else. Communication is key.
Lol leave it to me to make something so simple so complex
So,she doesn’t trust you and wants to take advantage of you.
Keep being separated,this is a huge red flag and you aren’t her husband.
Thank you. I have been trying to give her space which has resulted in me not seeing my kids much at all. I've been having a really tough time figuring out how to handle all of this, I expected her to come home rather than just get more and more distant. I finally got some in person time with my girls last weekend.
I was supposed to take paternity leave this week but didn't since she wasn't coming home with the kids and didn't want to take leave and not spend it with my kids. I plan to take paternity leave next 2 weeks and offering to take the kids. My family is my priority over work, which I've communicated but maybe she needs to see action.
Multiple of her family members brought up instances where they had judged me/my parenting lacking and they talked with her about them behind my back first rather than directly with me. So sadly I don't think it's just based on what she says.
Like I said, I don't think her family is the root of the problem and there are very real issues to solve, but I'm having a naked time figuring out how to solve them with us separated and limited access to my children.