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Date: October 18, 2022
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Are we sure it’s by accident? Those are many coincidences
I just want to point out that the boyfriend IS working at the job that she helped him get. So he isn't doing nothing.
You have a fundamental problem here in that you met and began a transactional relationship – yes, “spoiling and gifts” are transactional- with a person who is significantly older and has a greater income and you now wish this to be a partnership of equals.
That isn't really who this guy is, and you can “teach” him until the cows come home, but all you are teaching him is to better hide his behavior and opinions.
If he was interested in equal partnership, he would not have sought a relationship in which he is nearly a decade older and holds a strong financial advantage nor be ok with the transactional aspect. He/y'all may have developed feelings in what was intended to be casual, but it doesn't change who he is.
I'm not shitting on age gap relationships, nor saying you can't successfully have a relationship when there is income disparity, nor criticizing transactional relationships if everyone's aware and onboard. I'm saying that the factors here make an equal partnership unlikely and that you are probably attempting to mold unmalleable material. Also, his feelings toward you may change the more you try to improve him.
I don't know how much you depend on him, but my advice would be to stop. Then maybe move on and start a new relationship on more equal footing. I just don't think the current dude is going to adjust to your expectations.
He has to go. When he said she needed to be out of the bed. You should told him, “She was here before you and she will be here after you.”
His kids aa d him need to go
No I don’t try to paint him in a bad picture. To be honest, I just didn’t want to include bad stuff about him to be held morally accountable for my own mistakes.
It’s not about his mistakes and failures, this post is about me being aware of mine. I didn’t want to include all the bad stuff he did to me.. because with all his mental and also physical abuse towards me, people would feel sorry for me and would judge my mistakes differently. They’d say “yeah go for it” but I don’t want or need to hear that right now because I want to be held morally accountable for my own mistakes and feelings.
I don’t have an amazing boyfriend who is caring and loving. He is dr jeckyll and mr Hyde and if he doesn’t get his way he is gonna force it on me. He ignores me all the time, when I talk he doesn’t only listen he tells me to shut up. My voice is making him angry and when I say something wrong or he doesn’t like he becomes Mentally and physically abusive. So excuse me, but your answer is full of your own prejudice. Maybe you should look into that a little deeper.