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Date: October 17, 2022
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I’m writing specifically to address his nights out as that’s something I’ve dealt with too, I also have anxiety and went through the irrational anger and had to overcome that. I don’t think you’re wrong to be uncomfortable by it, but you should pinpoint what actually makes you feel angry when he’s not there. Is it insecurity, do you feel lonely/abandoned, do you feel it’s disrespectful, or is it something else? Then communicate with him. He can still compromise without giving up nights out with friends. He can give you a time frame of when he’ll be back. Or maybe when you’re getting ready to sleep just text him and let him know, and he can message you goodnight? Just for a little reassurance. He doesn’t need to be checking for your message every 5 minutes, but at some point in the night he’ll look at his phone. Just don’t use this as new fuel for your anxiety if it takes him awhile to respond.
As for you, drink some tea before bed, put on some white noise, opt for reading instead of scrolling, and try to think about the next day instead of just getting lost in how slowly the night is dragging on. Have something planned for yourself or the two of you to look forward to. Your mind will calm down and your body will be able to relax once you realize even these nights out are just like any other night. They’ll pass and you’ll both be fine in the morning.
And GET ANOTHER KEY! I could never sleep with the door unlocked.
He may be having second thoughts about it, and the pressure another child will bring, he may be feelings likes its no longer fun and its now a choir based on what your app says is a good time.
but the bigger issue is that he is not showering, doesn't want to be intimate. he sounds depressed. I would suggest taking a month off the app, communicate, try to just be spontaneous
good luck.
With my best friend
I really don't know about that one. I love vs and I love eating my girlfriend out. I love everything about her body tho.
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I think these posts are so dumb. Like obviously cut her off and tell your wife. Why do you need to post for advice? Stupid.
He should tell them beforehand!
Please consider talking this thru with a therapist. It can be nude to reconcile that someone we love is in fact abusive, I've been there. It took me years from my first realization to fully accepting the reality and therapy was key in making that change. She never pressured me to do anything, just helped me process my feelings, find my own truth then figure out what I wanted to do and come up with a plan. Having a supportive person in my life who I could be open with was truly lifechanging. I wish you all the best.
yeah what is that, $4?
Well, if it would have been one my exes they would have describe me as abusive and they as saints. Everyone except the one who didn’t make me puke, yet EVERYONE else describe them as abusive towards me, even their own friends. But not at first, at first they put it like OP that I was abusive and “crazy”, until they saw by themselves how twisted the truth was.
I’m not saying OP is lying, but she might just not be aware on her part in what’s going on.
Please check yourself too, maybe you’ll find a depth to your surprise 🙂