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Date: February 16, 2023
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Yeah, I feel like with these decisions, there's no one good option.
If you’ve been working on this with a therapist for a year, you need a new therapist. I know a lot of people have been telling you that, but I’m gonna tell you again-find a new therapist. Also, you should just bow out. Do you really think any of her friends are going to forget that you’re the asshole who said his ex was a 12 but their friend is a 10? They’ll never forget that. You’ll be the boyfriend/finance/husband who they avoid, so your girlfriend will be ostracized eventually because of you. And if you stop showing up to events because you don’t want to make anyone uncomfortable, you’ll still be an asshole because you’re the boyfriend who doesn’t like his girlfriend's friends. Or you’re the boyfriend who thinks he’s better than everyone. You really can’t win. You need to work on yourself and start over with a clean slate, so to speak. Work on your trauma to become a better person. Start medication, read books, joining groups, and etc. You can’t change overnight, but you can be a better partner in your next relationship.
Are you Jewish by any chance? Because not having skirts above the knee sounds like an issue with how observant you want to be. If he’s more observant than you, you should find someone who’s at the same religiosity level as you, otherwise it won’t work out.