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Stella, 20 y.o.
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On-line Live Sex Chat rooms Stella
Date: October 24, 2022
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Sucks it’s like this but there’s so much hate for black-men it’s insane.
Ever consider they might be HIS?
You want to online with this 50 years? Having children and hear “why can dad eat xxx?” You want him to cook because you are ill and it is fast food all day for days. Going in vacation and he never wants to try anything, he wants to go to the next fast food local. Never having a romsntic date night in a restaurant or so. And if you get invited to weddings or family events like thanks giving or christmas? With 30-35 he has diabetes.
I also find his behaviour so disrespectful. You cook for him. He doesn't even know how it taste. But how a child “Ewww, i don't want to eat this! I want chickyyy nuggets!!! buuaah! I hate you!!!”
I used to be very over the top with my security (IT/Engineering background). I might not have let you either at this point in my life.
You need and deserve a better BF!!
After suffering from depression most of my high teenage years and through my 20’s, I finally got around to seeing a therapists when I found out that I indeed suffered from depression. I did therapy for a whole year. Weekly, bi weekly, monthly and then every so often.
I have become very guarded. I used to be very open and outgoing. I used to suffer from insecurity and fear of abandonment. So I spend a lot of my time making sure I understand the feelings of the people around me so I can be the best Me that I can be for them. I don’t shop for myself often. I prefer to spend any dollar I can on my son, or my gf and her daughters. They’re what I value the most. I go to the gym because it helps my anxiety, and in return, helps with my physique and health. I don’t go out often to avoid spending money I can spend on quality time with my loved ones.
When it’s all said and done, my method of processing emotions has changed. I am very self aware. I am a more happier person but part of me misses being a little immature and spontaneous, like I used to be. The people around me like who I am and know that I’m in a better place but part of me feels locked away. Like I have to be the perfect person that I was “trained” to be.
Love on your husband. Assure him of who he is and who he was. Take him on random dates and activities. If he’s not spending on himself, do it for him. Be the other half he needs. What he’s not doing for himself, do it for him. Understand that he’s going through the exercises in his head to try to be a better person for you. Let him know it’s okay to keep his feet on the ground. Best of luck. For the both of you.
You’ve kind of hit the nail in a lot of ways. I said to him, you know I over plan and over think, and while I don’t expect you to be on my level of preparation, I do expect you to plan things better. This is a reoccurring problem in our relationship where he thinks exactly one steps head, just enough to get by, and I feel like that isn’t enough.
I’m struggling with the guilt of the situation because I know I play a part in this by not making clear my expectations, but it is so hard to not get angry with him for not talking to me and making this mess majority on his own and expecting me to bend and break to fix it. I feel guilty because I know he would help me in a time of need, but I would never put that onus on him. And as a single parent I have obligations and responsibilities that he can’t begin to understand.
After going back and forth for hours he finally said well maybe I could just get a place of my own the only issue is that would mean I’d have to sign a year long lease, which would mean I couldn’t move there soon. And I said you could find shorter leases, there’s ways around this, but you jumped straight into assuming I’d just go with this.
I don’t even know how I feel about the relationship at this point. This is very par for the course of him and it’s honestly exhausting. Not once did he take responsibility in his part of this mess despite me owning up to my own parts. It’s always “we need to do better, we need to work on this, we should try this” and never “I’m sorry, I messed up, and I own that”.
You are definitely being abused. I am so sorry you are going through this.
Try to find a friend that will help you get out. She’s physically, mentally, and emotionally abusing you. You are your own person and you don’t need to be tied to the hip 24/7/365.
Try to get out as safely as you can and tell no one where you are going. Pack up your stuff and your important documents (birth certificate, social security card, financial information, etc) and give them to a trusted friend who will not tell your soon to be ex-girlfriend where you will be.
Once you are safely out, block her on everything. Once all that is done, get some therapy for yourself. You will need it even though you may feel like you don’t need it. If you’re in college, check to see if they offer any services to talk to a professional.
You’ve got this and you deserve so much better than this “woman” (I’m using the term very loosely).
Update us when you can and hopefully it will be good news. Good luck.