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Alex, y.o.
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I’m guessing the environment you created made him feel like he would get shot down before he could even put in any work to figure out a plan.
I understand that the conversation was ridiculous, that conversation itself taught me never to ask questions I don’t want the answer to and to accept no answer as an answer.
Why doesn’t he trust me? What have I done wrong?
You know that, by doing this, he just asked her out, don't you?
Keep your eyes open. And don't trust them blindly.
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Anger is the right emotion to have (as long as it doesn't become debilitating). What you do is congratulate yourself for no longer being with this loser. You're allowing this new information to open old wounds and that's not necessary. If you're not already in therapy to cope with your “depressive state” you need to get there immediately. Relitigating something you've already escaped from isn't helpful.
Don't be that guy. If you're worried about something pertaining to her, the best thing to do is talk to her about it. I understand you're trying to be respectful and cautious due to her situation, but trying to go at it alone is not the way to do it. For something this big, communication will always be key, and you'll only know what she truly wants by hearing it directly from her, not from attempting your own solutions.
i was thinking the same thing.. but doubting myself
Yes, I know you are right. Thank you
No, he doesn't but he also doesn't have to stay with her and make her feel bad for getting tattoos. OP says getting tattoos brings her joy, makes her happy. She shouldn't be with anyone who would not support things that make her happy. They're incompatible.