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CONTROL TWICE AND ASK WHATEVER U WANA SEE
Date: February 6, 2023
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Who cares about what the numbers mean to him? It’s just a code to get into the phone, he’s had it for multiple years now so it’s just habit. What’s more concerning is him keeping intimate conversations he had with his ex, including pictures. Not to mention the text thread is muted, so that you wouldn’t know if he was secretly texting the ex again. After two years? Those pics and conversations need to be gone after a few months together, let alone two years together.
And it's not a philosophical debate, this is man you are presumably sleeping with which means you could get pregnant at some point. And, what happens if you for whatever reason need an abortion. We already see how “only if the mother's life is in danger” rules are playing out across the united states. What happens if you are miscarrying and need a d&c, would he say you look fine, your body does this naturally. Would he try to block your access to medical care. He is currently ideology over pragmatism, and you can't really know how he'll react when it's no longer theory, or that he would act in your best interests.
It's as the above person said, pro-life beliefs often come with a misogynistic streak, because at the end of the day, its refusing to recognize that 1) women deserve the right to dictate what happens to their own body including whether to act as a life support system for a potential human being and 2) that being a life support system for said potential human being comes with many financial, emotional and physical risks. It comes down to either believing women are naturally hysterical or are just plain liars. The second point you can see in other behaviors. Does he downplay your or other women's feelings, tell you that you are overreacting to things?
Her trauma does not get to impact the way you seek mental health assistance. Full stop. It’s her job to work on her issues, as it’s your job to work on yours. She knows that her ask is extreme, she knows her insecurities are not due to you or your behavior, she knows this isn’t a healthy ask – and so do you, OP.
Neither of you sound mentally healthy enough to be in a committed relationship where you are apparently, to her, the only reason either of you want to live!. That’s pique red flag, my guy.
Likely not.
This is exactly my first relationship. Like your wife, she also said that I should be the one to make the appointment.
I did but for myself, and I found out what I really wanted for myself, not for “us”. I left and it was a good thing. Guess what, some months later she was having plenty of sex. (Note that I’m happy for her, we’re on excellent terms)
It may seem she doesn’t want sex. But the issue might actually be that she doesn’t want sex with you. Which is fine but the truth just come out, for everyone’s sake.