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Date: February 11, 2023
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Respectfully, you need to budget your money better and not ask your boyfriend to subsidize your income. This means you may not be able to save as much for the trips you plan to take.
His income really shouldn't factor into your budgeting at all except when it comes to shared expenses.
The only thing I think might be reasonable is if you were to ask if he'd mind paying a higher amount of utilities and/or split the rent in direct proportion to both of your incomes (assuming that would mean you pay less than the 60/40 split you have now). If you have any other shared expenses (i.e. food or entertainment), you could request the same.
You could also let him know that you won't be able to save as much for the trip you plan to take and ask if he's willing to compromise on some of the budget items (i.e. getting a cheaper hotel). It's possible he will offer to contribute more to cover your half, but he certainly isn't obligated to do so.
I know it sucks but you're not married and don't have shared finances, so you should be financially independent of each other. That's my view anyways.
Since the dawn of time.
I'd skip the why and what for. Just text him. Tell him what you found, that it's unacceptable and it's over. Then block him. You don't owe him anything else.
Why are you marrying someone that you're not sexually compatible with, doesn't share your values, and treats you badly? Your sexlife will only go downhill after you marry someone that already isn't meeting your needs.
Her mom knows that if I beat her in family court, and I get visitation schedule rights, she'll lose her control. She won't have the power to make visitation her way and randomly cancel visits last minute because of “sickness” or “too busy”. I've tried to be nice to them time and time again, and each time they play with my heart and deceive me. No more Mr. Nice guy, and that spells doom for her narc mother.
He is behaving as a selfish asshole. Let him mope. He didn’t just have surgery and his body didn’t have to let go of a little person that was wanted. Grieve, Mama. Miscarriages are nude. It’s ok to take your time here and do not feel bad for him. He needs to be much more understanding and grow up.
At least in the US he cannot stop you. However, how important is this to you?
If it’s also equally important to him, you might end up divorced.