so then you have your answer there. i dont think that the feelings you are having are worth this experience. how many times will you let him keep doing this to you?
Try thinking about his hobbies and interests, something that he enjoys and puts a lot of effort into outside of work and yourself. Or maybe something of sentimental value. The price tag is much less important than the intent behind the gift. You know him more that we do so I’m sure you’ll make the right choice 🙂
I’m so sorry OP that everyone here is being harsh on you. “In sickness and in health” – I believe in this. If my partner had 102 fever, I wouldn’t leave him alone unless he wants me to. And if I was sick, I would love to have my partner with me. Not for taking care of me or anything, but his presence would make me feel so much better. I understand your point and I understand why you are upset.
Oh honey. What a situation. You are your partner are friends/roommates. You said it yourself you are still in love with your ex. It’s so easy to be swept up in the movement of things because you don’t want to hurt the other person. and although you are trying to be a good person in the end it’s not fair
I had an ex and the thought of getting a house, children/responsibilities, only ever having Sex with him again made me want to jump of a cliff. But now I’m with my fiancé I wouldn’t want to online life without him. That’s how you should be feeling.
You’ve got two choices 1) carry on as you are. Being miserable, not having sex, emotionally and probably eventually physically cheating on your current bf
Or
2) leave him. Ride the shit storm that it will cause for the short term. But eventually your both move on and meet people who you should be with.
that’s the thing, we have so many good times, these arguments are only something that happens the minority of the time we’re together, which is why i’m struggling.
problem is, when these things do happen, i end up feeling so small and worthless and like he’ll never see as a person, just a fragile little woman, which i know i’m not, so it hurts to be made to feel like it.
I mean it's up to you, if you don't feel like it, he shouldn't force you in any way, or make you feel bad for bailing, and you should communicate that to him (“There are times when I don't feel like doing this for you, don't make me feel bad for it if”) or something like that.
The other thing is make sure he's actually giving you as much as you are giving him. Does he go down on you as often? Does he give you pleasure as often? Even if you have a lower drive, there are surely things he could do outside of sex that could make you happy – is he doing those? As long as both of you are happy it's fine, but it doesn't seem like you are fully happy so fight for yourself and fix this situation.
You both want different things and you should find people that are compatible otherwise one of you is going to be unhappy
so then you have your answer there. i dont think that the feelings you are having are worth this experience. how many times will you let him keep doing this to you?
Try thinking about his hobbies and interests, something that he enjoys and puts a lot of effort into outside of work and yourself. Or maybe something of sentimental value. The price tag is much less important than the intent behind the gift. You know him more that we do so I’m sure you’ll make the right choice 🙂
I’m so sorry OP that everyone here is being harsh on you. “In sickness and in health” – I believe in this. If my partner had 102 fever, I wouldn’t leave him alone unless he wants me to. And if I was sick, I would love to have my partner with me. Not for taking care of me or anything, but his presence would make me feel so much better. I understand your point and I understand why you are upset.
Oh honey. What a situation. You are your partner are friends/roommates. You said it yourself you are still in love with your ex. It’s so easy to be swept up in the movement of things because you don’t want to hurt the other person. and although you are trying to be a good person in the end it’s not fair
I had an ex and the thought of getting a house, children/responsibilities, only ever having Sex with him again made me want to jump of a cliff. But now I’m with my fiancé I wouldn’t want to online life without him. That’s how you should be feeling.
You’ve got two choices 1) carry on as you are. Being miserable, not having sex, emotionally and probably eventually physically cheating on your current bf
Or
2) leave him. Ride the shit storm that it will cause for the short term. But eventually your both move on and meet people who you should be with.
that’s the thing, we have so many good times, these arguments are only something that happens the minority of the time we’re together, which is why i’m struggling.
problem is, when these things do happen, i end up feeling so small and worthless and like he’ll never see as a person, just a fragile little woman, which i know i’m not, so it hurts to be made to feel like it.
Dated 10 months two years ago. Broke up. But a year after got back together. Almost 10 months in so far
Yes, this is all abusive. All of it. Get away from him and block him on everything.
I mean it's up to you, if you don't feel like it, he shouldn't force you in any way, or make you feel bad for bailing, and you should communicate that to him (“There are times when I don't feel like doing this for you, don't make me feel bad for it if”) or something like that.
The other thing is make sure he's actually giving you as much as you are giving him. Does he go down on you as often? Does he give you pleasure as often? Even if you have a lower drive, there are surely things he could do outside of sex that could make you happy – is he doing those? As long as both of you are happy it's fine, but it doesn't seem like you are fully happy so fight for yourself and fix this situation.
Hahahahahaha, I've known more than enough women that wouldn't see that as a barrier.