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chloe-jeenner Public Chat Channel
Date: November 3, 2022
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I would have a nude time with a partner who did this to me, but if this is the first time and he’s apologetic, I don’t think you need to automatically dump him or anything. I would have a conversation about his pattern of doing this with other people (give specific examples), and it’s not nice and you’re worried he’d hurt you like this again. Would he be willing to talk to a therapist?
This hurt me because I was nothing but supporting
He’s not breaking up with you because of your lack of support. He knows you were supportive. But your support isn’t going to get him out of that hole. He needs to climb out of the hole he’s in. Somebody standing at the top of the hole yelling “you can do it” is great, but you’re not his ladder to get out of the hole. He needs to find that ladder and get out of the hole, and to do that he needs no distractions. He needs to devote all of his time and energy towards his career and financial situation, and can’t spend any of it on a relationship right now.
He didn’t unfollow you on insta to hurt you or because you hurt him. He did it so he can heal and move on. He can’t move on if he’s constantly seeing your insta posts, stories, or you moving on with somebody new. It’s only going to hurt him and make him wish he was still with you. He wants to be with you, he just can’t now. That’s why he left his profile public for you, but doesn’t want to see yours.
He’s sending those texts because he wants to talk to you and be with you, but knows he can’t. He’s hoping it sparks a conversation so he can hold onto something. If he tries to text you again, my best suggestion would be to tell him that he can’t have his cake and eat it too. He can’t break up with you and then still constantly talk to you for support and try to keep you interested in him. He needs to decide to either end things, or stay together, and can’t get the best of both worlds
Good luck
I reasonably think you're an asshole. Fuck off.
Why tell them at all? They know exactly what they doing…they are not your friends… cut them out of your life and find friends that will be there for you and not just a convenience to them. Don't say a word…don't give them the satisfaction!!!
Gently tell them they don't get to pick your partner. They can offer opinions, but it's entirely your choice. They don't have to like your decision, but they do have to keep quiet about it. Any attempt to come between you and your girlfriend will backfire and push you further away from them.
Your agreements seem invite conflicts. Basic articulating and respecting boundaries would make your rules a moot point.
You can stay together for the kids if you think that's best for them. It's ur call. Maybe put him on a 90 day probation and see how he handles it.
That's the same thing as “but”
Can’t recorded my phone while I am on call. But verbally he told me 3 times this week.
You solve it by dating women of your own age and income instead of someone barely old enough to have graduated college who obviously isn't going to have an income covering this kind of expenditure.
In other words find someone more mature to date.
It can but it may also make it move back from the ex-friend.
This what OP needs to have her go one of two ways on her own accord. It's about getting a result and whether the result is bad (she continues or even doubles down on it) or is good (she stops what she is doing) it's so much better than this weird limbo he is currently in.
I managed to work, get my education, raise a young child, and deal with brain surgery all at the same time. If their is a will their is a way. Not going to argue about it with you.
I think you're being selfish. Your husband lost his brother and his sister in law and he probably wants to do this to help with his brother's memory. The custody of the daughter probably passed to the grandmother because the father wants nothing to do with her.
I feel like everytime I’ve tried to talk to him he doesn’t care to hear it. It’s always “this again?” and i talk without being heard. I appreciate your view on things. I agree there are definitely things we have both tried to ignore that is becoming bigger & louder