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Room for on-line sex video chat FlaviaMiele
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Birth Date: 2004-04-09
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Date: October 9, 2022
I agree with you that hours worked inside and outside the home should be even regardless of pay. But I also see the point that OP CHOOSES to work in a job she loves but that job doesn't pay well. Her husband doesn't have that luxury because someone has to pay the bills. The wife is “nurturing her hobbies” during her work time, and let's assume the husband would work somewhere else for less money and more enjoyment if he could.
OP mentions that she works more hours than her husband. Should he therefore do more housework to even it out? What if she works so much more that for it to be even, husband has to do all the housework? Even if she were making more money, at some point that becomes a choice. We all know workaholic spouses, who don't need to work all that time and don't contribute to housework. Is that fair?
I'm just saying that with partners that have their own and each others' best interests at heart could sit down and decide what's the most fair way to deal with this. If I'm the husband, I'd want my spouse to enjoy her work and I'd be proud of her. If I'm the wife, I'd get that working less would help by being able to take on more of the housework and free up time for both of them. And in either place, I'd understand that if things are not well balanced out, the other side may feel resentment. But it takes communication, a partnership and most importantly, awin/win rather than an adversarial approach.
No in my opinion it’s not normal but people think that it’s a normal thing.
Asking a partner about things in regards to their previous sexual history offers nothing positive in a relationship and the only thing that comes from it is negativity and it opens up insecurities in that person, even if that person doesn’t ever or hasn’t ever been or had any insecurities.
Answer me the question, what value, or what positive affect does knowing something sexually that your partner has previously done? Or how would that improve or benefit your relationship with that person? There isn’t anything and I remain to be given a valid reason for knowing such information.
When you get with a new partner and you don’t know anything about their previous sexual history or sexual experiences the same thing with not knowing their relationship history then you have a totally blank canvas to learn about they person, what they like or don’t like sexually, what is okay and what isn’t and you go through it together.
However knowing a partner’s previous sexual history or experiences and with who and what they have done with others only ever leads to that partner becoming self conscious, losing their self esteem and confidence etc because they start saying to themselves “well my girlfriend said she always climaxed with her previous partners but she doesn’t with me, what am I doing wrong? Don’t I do it right? Doesn’t she find me attractive? Don’t I turn her on?’ It always leads to those types of scenarios where the new partner ends up comparing themselves to their partners previous sexual experiences that they have been told about and they end up destroying themselves.
Just look at the OPs post for proof of what I am saying the OP is comparing the fact that he had been in a relationship with his girlfriend for a significant amount of time and he is saying that she hardly has anal with him and he is comparing it to the amount of times that his girlfriend has had anal with a guy she met on Tinder! He has mentioned Tinder specifically because he obviously feels that is hookup scenario and he is a long term boyfriend and he is thinking how come she did all that anal with him and more and she doesn’t want to with me? He also went detailed and said that he and his girlfriend always use poppers (amyl nitrite) with each other but now he has found out that she has used them with this same Tinder hookup and his own words are that he thought that was one of their firsts together that he thought was personal to them and now he is destroyed that it isn’t- another thing that he is comparing.
Whereas if he didn’t know at all about his girlfriends previous sexual history or experiences then he wouldn’t be in this situation with his mind and brain going a hundred miles an hour and he would actually be happy with how things are, so much so he wouldn’t even be thinking that he isn’t getting enough anal with her and he would be totally happy with the anal experiences he has shared with her.
The ONLY caveat to this in my opinion where it is positive to disclose your previous sexual history with a partner is if you have been subjected to sexual abuse or assault of any kind previously and as a result of the trauma you unfortunately have situations where you are triggered in certain sexual circumstances as a result of your previous assault, it’s important to let your partner know in these circumstances so you don’t harm yourself by being unnecessarily triggered and re-traumatised by something that your partner may do, even then I believe you should limit what you say to those particular triggers
Because he groomed her when she was a child and he was her teacher.
I’m worried about that guy, he should get checked