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Hellen, 32 y.o.
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Date: September 27, 2022
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Tbh, this feels like another scenario where having an honest conversation is necessary! Not sure exactly when you realized you're aromantic but she needs to know. I would definitely recommend telling her something along the lines of (obviously adapt based on what is true for you) ” I really loved your Christmas gift 🙂 I wanted to let you know how much I enjoy our relationship and I care about you. I've realized that I'm aromantic and though I enjoy spending time together, a romantic relationship doesn't really fit for me. I'd still enjoy being friends, but think maybe returning to that would be best (or that you want to keep dating, but the romantic side of things isn't your style). Obviously trying to break it to her as gently as possible would be ideal
Edit: age gap aside, what is your perspective? How would you go about this?
The relationship has run it's course and it's time to leave and in the immortal words of Elsa, “LET IT GO!”
I don’t understand why she is so upset and why she refuses to talk to me
If you break the silence and lead with anything, best lead with an apology. It can be odd, being at your partner's place, with their friends/housemates there and then get abandoned for 45 minutes. That's a long time to be twiddling your thumbs. Nude to know what to do with yourself at that point. Chill, sleep, go down and join them? It's an awkward situation to be in.
So probably best to apologise, explain that the conversation was heavy, unexpected and you lost track of time. If it's a regular thing, make it less regular assuming things aren't already done. Also a heads up can help, acknowledge she's there on her own and at least explain that there's some real shit going down with a friend and you've got to go offer support.
Simply say. “Listen I understand you care about your son and would like to know what went wrong between us, but my relationship decisions don’t involve you. I hold no animosity towards you and I appreciate the kindness you extended me while your son and I were together. The truth is your son might be a good guy, he just isn’t the right person for me. This is my job, and anyone is welcome to shop here, and yes I know you but this interaction makes me extremely uncomfortable because again this is my place of employment.