kattiebonnet

8 thoughts on “kattiebonnet”

1. Because you told her it was okay to do it if the opportunity come up. You shouldn’t have agreed to something that might bother you in the future.

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2. That is an awesome and thoughtful gift. It sounds like something my GF would buy, and she's the holy grail of gift givers. Even if I never wound up using it, I would be stoked to get a gift like that (I'm a contractor/handyman). Sounds like a possibility he's fighting a little bit of depression, tbh. Therapy might be more useful than buying “better” gifts. Honestly, you did an amazing job buying him a gift, imho.

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3. He’s wrecked. Passed out on his buddies couch. He’s gonna feel like shit tomorrow when he wakes up. Let him know that you were hurt by this then drop it. Don’t bring it up again. Look for changes in his behavior, this seems like a silly early 20’s problem that is likely nothing more than got too drunk

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4. Oh god. Very hot to gauge.

   The thing is, you two had loose and strange boundaries. A lot of gray area. Areas that some partners would not be okay with, yet there was an approval on it.

   So, its kind of nude to differentiate what was right vs wrong, when there was a lot of overlap.

   I would say that any conversation that is sexual in nature should be shot down immediately.

   And something like this should be shot down too:

   but then things escalated and she started complimenting me about how my voice is sexy and my face and body and all of that

   And then this:

   really don’t remember EXACTLY what was said but I do remember the compliments giving me an ego boost/making me feel giddy.

   To me sounds like she was flirting with you and you were giddy about it. So, I do think that is disrespectful to your partner.

   Maybe take this as a learning experience? Next relationship keep it a little more in the lines. Don't go for gray area boundaries because they clearly resulted in failure here.

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5. I agree. If the truth is so dark it would destroy OP and their dad, then perhaps that’s why she’s reacting like this and not spilling the beans. Have you considered that OP?

   Perhaps she is so traumatised from what happened she can’t even begin to speak about it. Mental health conditions such as split personality disorder have a link with trauma and so you shouldn’t judge her inability to speak about this as meaning she is guilty.

   OP describes her as such a happily married woman, do we really think an affair is really the likely scenario?

   I would ask her gently in a way that indicates that you would believe her – because many assault victims are terrified of not being believed.

   Maybe you could say:

   “Mum, I have been thinking about this and how happy you have always seemed with Dad and how much you are struggling with this. It seems so unlikely that you had an affair… we’re you assaulted mum? Please tell me and maybe we can work through this together. Or you can speak to someone else, a counsellor or something if you don’t want to speak to me but I’m just desperate to know what is going on with you. I love you.”

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6. Depression is a crazy thing. He obviously needs professional help, and you need to focus on bringing your baby into the world. Let him get the help he needs, and see what comes of that down the road. You cannot help him in the way he needs right now

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7. Thank you for the reply. My best friend can be a little territorial about her mutual friends sometimes too so I wouldn't feel comfortable inviting any of them to events of mine. She would probably feel like I overstepped or something

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8. I mean all the red flags are there! She’s a liar and a cheater, if you take her back don’t be surprised if it happens again. She doesn’t even sound remorseful for her actions. And it’s only been 4 months when. Sorry dude get out now

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