I think it's fine to turn down some parties here and there, but there should be some show of effort to engage with your friends circle as a way of demonstrating that he cares about the things which are important to you.
Why not just be blunt and ask her so why even tell me?
Are you letting me know because you're trying to hurt my feelings, or do you think that somehow I needed the info that you're nearby but I'm not invited?
Ask her to explain her logic and then write her out of your life.
I could totally see how his mental state is making it harder to fix the situation, but I really don't see what other options there are besides moving. His wife's decision to wait it out which he is perceiving as dismissal is understandable because she would be the one making a huge sacrifice if they moved. That also could easily make it feel like she cares more about her job than his wellbeing.
So when I was a kid, my dad must have said something to my mom about the way she washed his work clothes. I’m not sure what he said, but it was clear to my mom that he didn’t appreciate the fact that she took the time to make sure his work clothes were clean (they both worked).
After that, my mom never washed my dads work clothes again.
If someone doesn’t appreciate what you do for them, just stop doing it. It doesn’t have to be any more complicated than that. I agree with all of the other commenters saying that you should go on strike. You’re not being respected and the things you do for your husband are not being appreciated. So, stop doing them. Tell him that you want to be appreciated and respected as a partner, and that if he wanted a mother he should have never moved out of his mamas house.
Stand up for yourself – you’re the only one who can do that. Have your own back just like you’d want your best friend to have your back (or how you wouldn’t let anyone disrespect your best friend).
Yeah, I go through my partner’s stuff as well, i see her as a possession and therefore I don’t respect her autonomy to have her own private thoughts.
I find when this causes insecurities the best way to handle it is to bottle it up, having a direct conversation about thoughts and feeling with her is beneath a man of my emotional intelligence.
2 things 1.stop making excuses and accept that you don't know her at all 2. Seek help from a therapist, you need to work on your self-esteem, it is not normal to let yourself be mistreated and defend yourself.
Reply back, no you won't, then block!!
Just sounds like he's being selfish then.
I think it's fine to turn down some parties here and there, but there should be some show of effort to engage with your friends circle as a way of demonstrating that he cares about the things which are important to you.
I truly wish I could give you a glimpse into your mind eight years from now and ask you to look at a 22yo.
I'm 34…people your age are kids to me. Your mother knows that this is an unhealthy and skewed dynamic. Listen to her.
Why not just be blunt and ask her so why even tell me?
Are you letting me know because you're trying to hurt my feelings, or do you think that somehow I needed the info that you're nearby but I'm not invited?
Ask her to explain her logic and then write her out of your life.
I could totally see how his mental state is making it harder to fix the situation, but I really don't see what other options there are besides moving. His wife's decision to wait it out which he is perceiving as dismissal is understandable because she would be the one making a huge sacrifice if they moved. That also could easily make it feel like she cares more about her job than his wellbeing.
So when I was a kid, my dad must have said something to my mom about the way she washed his work clothes. I’m not sure what he said, but it was clear to my mom that he didn’t appreciate the fact that she took the time to make sure his work clothes were clean (they both worked).
After that, my mom never washed my dads work clothes again.
If someone doesn’t appreciate what you do for them, just stop doing it. It doesn’t have to be any more complicated than that. I agree with all of the other commenters saying that you should go on strike. You’re not being respected and the things you do for your husband are not being appreciated. So, stop doing them. Tell him that you want to be appreciated and respected as a partner, and that if he wanted a mother he should have never moved out of his mamas house.
Stand up for yourself – you’re the only one who can do that. Have your own back just like you’d want your best friend to have your back (or how you wouldn’t let anyone disrespect your best friend).
Show me a Man who doesn’t Love them, and I’ll steal his Girlfriend..
Yeah, I go through my partner’s stuff as well, i see her as a possession and therefore I don’t respect her autonomy to have her own private thoughts.
I find when this causes insecurities the best way to handle it is to bottle it up, having a direct conversation about thoughts and feeling with her is beneath a man of my emotional intelligence.
Your husband is a massive twat. What’s the betting this is his usual cunty MO.
Go to the police station and report.
Get a restraining order and have it served on him.
Is there a way you can stay with a friend or relative that he doesn't know so he cannot find you for awhile?
2 things 1.stop making excuses and accept that you don't know her at all 2. Seek help from a therapist, you need to work on your self-esteem, it is not normal to let yourself be mistreated and defend yourself.
You poor dumb bastard