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I'm working on it. The regional mental health assoc. Gave 2 choices. Go to nearest hospital or mental health cops show up. She chose 1, but she wants a divorce. I am waiting for her to get into the car and go. This is tough.
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The fact that she doesn’t have anyone except her (maybe) most recent hookup is a huge RED FLAG.
This is manipulative and possibly a premeditated attempt to find a new living situation.
Agree with the other comments. A Hail Mary gesture is just a distraction that she will probably take as a sign that you still aren’t taking her concerns seriously. Instead, I would present her with a list (and the receipts) of everything you’re doing to address her concerns (e.g., going to therapy 1x/week, taking antidepressants, exercising, eating well, sleeping well, journaling, meditating, etc.). If you aren’t already doing those things (or whatever specific things your care team recommends), then you aren’t taking her or your mental health seriously.
The bottom line is she doesn’t want to have a child with someone whose going to need more help himself than he can provide as a co-parent. Kids are a ton of work and will likely exacerbate existing untreated mental illness. Your wife is right to insist that you take care of yourself before wanting to have a family together.
“dont disrespect a man in his house” god you people truly do live! in one hell of a backwater, wild west, primitive ass, antiquated weird fuck feudalism esque, backward, syphilitic brained delusion together don't yas. Do you banish women to the fields during their “time of vast shame thou mustn'th speaketh oft” too?
My wife and I keep our arguments private, especially the bigger stuff. The benefit for her is getting an opinion on a subject outside of herself but the opinions of her friends and family will likely be biased in her favor. You could do the same with your friends. Not in a tit for tat kind of way but maybe making you see things differently regarding your disagreements.
The key is, is she talking to you as well? If her friends are simply augmenting your conversations, I don't see a problem with it. If she's telling them things she's not telling you, that's a problem.
I would suggest that if you don't intend to use your family or friends as a sounding board for things, that you have a counselor to help you work through things. Sometimes we get in our heads about things. My wife and I have a policy of never being in our own heads alone. Meaning, talk about things. Don't create some huge problem in your own head that has an easy solution if you were to talk to your partner or anyone else about it.
Trust your husband on this one. He has your relationship best interest in mind.