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Lexi, 23 y.o.
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Date: September 25, 2022
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Lexi, 23 y.o.
Location:
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To Start on-line video press there
You wrote that post 8 hours ago and talked about how he caused the worst 2 months of your life and that leaving was the best thing you've done.
No I don't believe you. This is a fake post meant for rage bait.
You wouldn't be writing that 8 hours ago if you're still together.
They literally say that about serial killers and murderers all the time.
True. Thinking about it, the few times I’ve tried it was met with scorn. Undertones that I wasted her time and that it was my fault in a way it even happened.
Your cousins right and you’re wrong. Your boyfriend is a fetishizing creep that was flirting with a 15 year old. You are worth so much more than being with a creepy dude like that. That’s not true love, it’s grooming.
You are looking for someone to confirm your fears and tell you to get out and run for your life. Statistics report that men who have choked women have gone further and even killed them. Get out NOW.
Well this is a but to unpack here.
In a way, I wanted to “save her”.
You cannot fix people nor is it your responsibility. People can only fix themselves because they want to. I use to want to fix people, but personally I've came to terms that I cannot fix someone who isn't willing to fix themselves.
Feel like you dodged a bullet here, you seen red flags but chose to ignore them (a red flag is still a red flag). Then she proceeded to give you more red flags. You can have different views and such in a relationship, but it sounds almost as if she wanted to debate because you two had such different views. Like she wanted to see how far she could go, seeing as she encouraged you to break up with her by having you just say “it”. Why didn't she just say it herself?
Take this as a new start. You just moved to a new town, new job, new environment. Will be a good opportunity to meet new people and / or potentially new partners. Of course, take the time to heal cause often people forget that being the person to initiate a break up doesn't always feel good. I'd suggest looking into personal therapy for yourself, too. Reading this just made me sad to see you say, “All I can see are those depressing lonely nights and mornings ahead of me.”
On the bright side, you won't be having conspiracy theory debates before bed or when you wake up lol.
It'll get better in time, better you found out this now before she actually moved in with you.
Almost everyone's advice here is spot on: hope for the best, but prepare for the worst. Gaming this out in your mind will help you explain the situation fully, and make your case.
The only thing I'd add it to avoid catastrophizing the situation (as some in here are)–that your wife, regardless of your agreement to be childfree, will out-of-hand reject your daughter, leave you, or be resentful of her.
Explain this is unexpected and a major life “curveball” Validate her feelings (this is a 180 degree change/this is “a lot”) Re-assure your love for her and your life together Tell her why this means so much to you to do, and listen to her response.
Humans can be shitty–but they also have an amazing capacity to adapt, as long as all cards are on the table, and all parties have communication and realistic goals.
She probably met someone new she is interested in having sex with, so now she doesn’t feel comfortable having sex with someone who is not that person.
Your boyfriend spent 5 hours dancing with another woman? How is that the behavior of someone in a committed relationship? It’s not. He says it all to support his friend. I call bullshit. I wouldn’t be okay with this. Why are you?
Would “ignored” have been a better word?
I told him! Unfortunately he can’t attend because it’s a close friends party and no one is really bringing plus ones