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Your post was removed for the following reason(s):
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Posts must:
include details about the involved parties including ages, genders, and length of relationship, and
request advice in real situations involving two or more people
We are enforcing the two rules listed above by making all titles use the following formatting:
[##X][##X], [## X][## X], or [##-X][##-X] where ## is the age and X is the gender (currently M, F, T, A, NB, FTM, MTF but more can be added). You can have more than two ages/genders listed, but you must have at least two. Here is an example:
if she gets drunk then there's a chance she'll get banged, the thing is you'll never know unless she feels guilty, I'd tell her to fuck off how worried she feel if it was reversed.
The only thing you're right about is wasting my time on your narcissistic views.
Not narcissistic, just view of someone with self-worth. I mean you chose to respond to my one sentence comment with a paragraph so you being here is your fault lol.
I suggested grace as an “option” pending him evaluating the rest of the 6yrs.
Good for you. That wasn't relevant to my original comment to you.
You can't handle opposing views tho. Need to make personal attacks, belittling comments, and outright dismissals – when you're the one veering off topic to focus on my typing or other such Logical fallacies.
I can though, it's why I'm picking them apart piece by piece.
Need to make personal attacks
If you wanna take being called a pathetic doormat a personal attack then sure. It should be “attack” though without the S.
belittling comments
You replied with plenty of belitting comments too, do you see me crying about those like you are?
and outright dismissals – when you're the one veering off topic to focus on my typing or other such Logical fallacies.
Outright dismissals? Where, please quote it. I've been staying on topic the entire time, in fact with my first comment it had nothing to do with the “grace” you're talking about but you decided to bring that back around. Hmm, who's going off topic now?
I'm done.
Now you're done lol.
I tried to offer advice based in grace and focus on love. You chose to focus on hate, mistrust, and lack of 2nd chances.
Where did I choose to focus on hate? Listen, you let people cheat on you and keep giving them chances. I'm advising people to value themselves a little more. Men nowadays have low self-worth and will accept so much shit behaviour from women but this advice also works for both genders.
All regarding a 19yr olds actions… The brain doesn't even finish forming till 25…
Right so anyone under 25 has no personal responsibility and can't take accountability for their actions, that makes sense. Sounds like an excuse to do shit and then when people check you on it when you get older, you bring up “Oh I was young and dumb”. Seems you're one of those people that suffer with making “mistakes” and then blaming your age to dodge accountability.
But yes – even tho they both wanted to get married – and potentially be each other's soul mates… Let's give ZERO room for grace
Right, let's advise someone to get married to someone who cheated on them and lied to them for 6 years, very smart.
when you only know a few tidbits of their lives…. But so free to condemn.
I mean people should condemn bad behaviour, if no one does then people don't learn. Are you gonna reward your child with candy for having a tantrum in a store? Of course not, but you will reward a cheater lol.
Sad. Hope you can find some happiness, and try spreading that – vs the hateful emotions you've spent spreading so far…
I'm the happiest I've ever been actually, none of the advice I suggested is hateful, crazy how holding people accountable for their actions is now seen as hateful. Anyways, I enjoyed this discussion. You have a wonderful day my guy. 🙂
Yeeaahhhh time to ditch him, then. I'm assuming he'll use you as a placeholder until someone with “specially coloured” eyes pop up.
You're young, plenty of good guys out there who are mature enough to want to be with you, for you! Not because you're their physical ideal (I mean, who is? I know I'm not my partner's physical ideal and we've been together over 12 years), but for who you are.
Cheating is whatever you as a couple decide to set as the boundaries as cheating.
If you haven't done that, then cheating is whatever you feel like is a violation of your trust/commitment.
And: it doesn't matter if it is cheating. It makes you feel shitty. It makes you feel insecure. And not only is that not a good enough reason for her to stop, turns out that's explicitly the point!
I won't necessarily whole condemn her as a bad person, as she's young and clearly bad at relationships, and has likely internalized some really bad notions of her own value and how dating works in general. She has a lot to learn and hopefully learns it.
But not with you. Staying not only prolongs your own feeling of being manipulated, it also validates her choices.
Just get out of there. This is him showing his true colors. Don't give him another opportunity.
This has gotta be a troll.
Hello /u/TheboyFromthere,
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if she gets drunk then there's a chance she'll get banged, the thing is you'll never know unless she feels guilty, I'd tell her to fuck off how worried she feel if it was reversed.
I understand
Yes, inherently biologically inferior, that is exactly the rhetoric we need 🙂
The only thing you're right about is wasting my time on your narcissistic views.
Not narcissistic, just view of someone with self-worth. I mean you chose to respond to my one sentence comment with a paragraph so you being here is your fault lol.
I suggested grace as an “option” pending him evaluating the rest of the 6yrs.
Good for you. That wasn't relevant to my original comment to you.
You can't handle opposing views tho. Need to make personal attacks, belittling comments, and outright dismissals – when you're the one veering off topic to focus on my typing or other such Logical fallacies.
I can though, it's why I'm picking them apart piece by piece.
Need to make personal attacks
If you wanna take being called a pathetic doormat a personal attack then sure. It should be “attack” though without the S.
belittling comments
You replied with plenty of belitting comments too, do you see me crying about those like you are?
and outright dismissals – when you're the one veering off topic to focus on my typing or other such Logical fallacies.
Outright dismissals? Where, please quote it. I've been staying on topic the entire time, in fact with my first comment it had nothing to do with the “grace” you're talking about but you decided to bring that back around. Hmm, who's going off topic now?
I'm done.
Now you're done lol.
I tried to offer advice based in grace and focus on love. You chose to focus on hate, mistrust, and lack of 2nd chances.
Where did I choose to focus on hate? Listen, you let people cheat on you and keep giving them chances. I'm advising people to value themselves a little more. Men nowadays have low self-worth and will accept so much shit behaviour from women but this advice also works for both genders.
All regarding a 19yr olds actions… The brain doesn't even finish forming till 25…
Right so anyone under 25 has no personal responsibility and can't take accountability for their actions, that makes sense. Sounds like an excuse to do shit and then when people check you on it when you get older, you bring up “Oh I was young and dumb”. Seems you're one of those people that suffer with making “mistakes” and then blaming your age to dodge accountability.
But yes – even tho they both wanted to get married – and potentially be each other's soul mates… Let's give ZERO room for grace
Right, let's advise someone to get married to someone who cheated on them and lied to them for 6 years, very smart.
when you only know a few tidbits of their lives…. But so free to condemn.
I mean people should condemn bad behaviour, if no one does then people don't learn. Are you gonna reward your child with candy for having a tantrum in a store? Of course not, but you will reward a cheater lol.
Sad. Hope you can find some happiness, and try spreading that – vs the hateful emotions you've spent spreading so far…
I'm the happiest I've ever been actually, none of the advice I suggested is hateful, crazy how holding people accountable for their actions is now seen as hateful. Anyways, I enjoyed this discussion. You have a wonderful day my guy. 🙂
Even outside the income the relationship is totally imbalanced. You seem to be putting more of everything into the relationship.
What does she do that makes you feel good?
Yeeaahhhh time to ditch him, then. I'm assuming he'll use you as a placeholder until someone with “specially coloured” eyes pop up.
You're young, plenty of good guys out there who are mature enough to want to be with you, for you! Not because you're their physical ideal (I mean, who is? I know I'm not my partner's physical ideal and we've been together over 12 years), but for who you are.
Cheating is whatever you as a couple decide to set as the boundaries as cheating.
If you haven't done that, then cheating is whatever you feel like is a violation of your trust/commitment.
And: it doesn't matter if it is cheating. It makes you feel shitty. It makes you feel insecure. And not only is that not a good enough reason for her to stop, turns out that's explicitly the point!
I won't necessarily whole condemn her as a bad person, as she's young and clearly bad at relationships, and has likely internalized some really bad notions of her own value and how dating works in general. She has a lot to learn and hopefully learns it.
But not with you. Staying not only prolongs your own feeling of being manipulated, it also validates her choices.