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Olivia, 20 y.o.
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Date: October 3, 2022
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You guys should have actually tried living together first before deciding to make that kind of decision and commitment in buying a house.
wow imagine if the genders were reversed
This guy has already shown you he has no idea what he wants. He’s also shown you he isn’t respecting your boundaries. You say he’s okay with keeping it on a friendship level, but then he’s ordering you to tell other people you have someone in your life? That’s not respecting you, that’s saying “yeah I hear you but we are going to do it my way anyway”. If you were to marry him, would you be content with having your boundaries and opinions ignored and trampled on in the same way for the rest of your life? Would you be happy with someone who is hot and cold the way he has demonstrated? A husband that drops of the face of the earth when he doesn’t like how things are going, just so when he does come back you’re just relieved he is there? I think you know you deserve better than this. And I know what it’s like to grow up religious and have men court me and just wish it would work. But you have to take a step back. You deserve love, respect, and devotion. Not cheap promises from someone who has shown they only care about themselves.
Yes I have, but I do not make this general practice. I don’t go into work expecting or hoping to make friends. I am friendly but leave it at that for the most part. I even manage to keep in contact and friendly relationships with former coworkers that I do not consider friends.
Mixing up your workplace and friendships is a dangerous game. Unless you have a good frame of reference of who to trust and how to develop those relationships while maintaining professionalism, I do not recommend. And it seems as OP does not have those skills yet. It is much better to go into work viewing the people you work as coworkers and possibly gaining trust and a cordial relationship with someone you connect with on a friendship level over time. OP did not do that. She blindly trusted her coworker as potential friends and got herself into a sticky situation that is risking her job. There are plenty of places to be social and meet people with common interests. Risking your livelihood is not worth it.
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Telling someone “we need to talk” vs just sitting down at getting to issue is what I meant. Leading with “we need to talk” is incredibly anxiety inducing.
Honestly tell him what do you have to lose? If he doesn’t want to be with you in that way then he will say it and you guys can still be friends cause it won’t be super awkward since you live! in different countries. And if he does then maybe you can finally have the man you’ve been in love with for 20 years
It’s also extremely fortunate that OP didn’t get married or have a child with this man, which is surprising after 7 years of dating. Usually the more predatory men try to find a permanent way to keep the woman in his life.
He is a gold digger. Your post is a whole list of him trying to get you to pay the bills, skip presents, and judge you
this. you can't make someone help themselves and you also can't always be someone's savior.
And he’s laying the groundwork for cheating with the whole “you don’t want to have sex with me anymore” BS.
At 26 she’s beyond her expiration date and he wants to find another 19 year old to manipulate and fuck.