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dannarivers chat
Date: October 11, 2022
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What happened? If you need closure maybe you should ask him to call/ FaceTime/meet in person to discuss the end of the relationship one final time. Perhaps now that the initial wave of emotions from the break up have subsided, you may both be able to think more clearly and have further things you’d like to say. Once you’ve had this final conversation, then block him and focus on moving on.
You are exactly on point. Yes, the comment was in poor humour and would've also made a lot of people uncomfortable. As you said, it was probably also driven by his want to have sex, no logic behind it.
But it was something that could've been fixed on the spot. Apologetic and remorseful, as you said. The anger was confusing. Thank you for your response.
You’re 25 dude. Time to know how you deserve to be treated and shut down foolishness in your relationships. Tell your boyfriend he needs to get over it.
….. so you both are not sober, and tired, and he’s horny.
He turns away, probably for the reasons you mentioned, trying to avoid anything, then you decide it’s a good time to cuddle him…..
What he did is wrong, no question, but did you also know that cuddling him without his consent is also wrong? Do you realise that to a horny inebriated person, a cuddle is often the start of something more?
So yes you are right to feel creeped out and disgusted about it, tell him how he made you feel when he did it. But own up to your own part in it.
Tell him that you know it might have felt like you were coming on to him, and that is why you think he did what he did, but you weren’t, that you have told him no sexual contact when you are not sober, that his actions were horrible, and that you are disgusted with him about it.
Then depending on his response, you will be able to decide if you continue with the relationship or not.
I am starting to doubt that you will go through with it. I also had 2 beautiful years with my ex until she cheated on me. So I dumped her. Because I respect myself.
Honestly at this point you’re out of nice options. Talking didn’t work, budgeting didn’t work, pointing out reality doesn’t work.
Honestly I’d open two more checking accounts. Put the same amount in each that you agree on. That’s to cover treats. Anything from the joint needs to be discussed before hand. Set up a text alert to text when ANYTHING hits that account so you both immediately know when someone uses it.
And tell her to get a fucking job. It’s been a year. She doesn’t have a job because she doesn’t want one and you’re letting her get whatever she wants so she has zero reason to.
This is weird. You don’t own lotus flowers. She can put whatever she wants on her body…clearly she told you why she wanted it and it had nothing to do with you. I have a wolf tattoo and a few of my friends also have a wolf tattoo. It’s really not that deep.
Same! It's very naked for me to ask for help. I grew up having to be very independent.
My boyfriend always offers people rides because he doesn't want anyone drinking or driving, or for people to be walking alone at night. It's nice knowing that I can rely on him if / when I need to get home safe.
Girl, insult them back. They’re being assholes on purpose. Nothing wrong with being one back. You’re successful! They’re just being hateful. And if your boyfriend has been witnessing this then RUN
My advice? Get and stay as far away from this abusive, controlling, manipulative cheater as you possibly can. Block him on everything and never speak to him again.
That makes total sense. Abusers escalate at marriage, pregnancy abs when you try to leave. be careful and get out.