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??????? ???????, 39 y.o.
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Date: October 10, 2022
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I know and itโs a constant back and forth with me on whether or not to care. I plan on leaving him when I have my financials in order. Itโs the meantime that bothers me. I have to sleep next to him knowing heโs always going to fuck me over and never love me the way I want him to. Until I leave. That will be the day he cares, hopefully. But by then I surely wonโt. Iโve done too much caring while he does none.
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124 is perfectly fine for your height. 112 is almost underweight.
So wtf is your bf even going on about?????
I think itโs kinda sus even if my partner was trying to comfort any woman after a break up outside of work in general.
Nope, nope nope. You know what you have to do. No coming back from this. 1. He treated and talked to you like shit. 2. He was texting /talking to her while treating you awful 3. you were at home watching his child while he left and went to her house and FUCKED her. 4. He came home walked by you ll- ignored you. You put the child to bed then went to bed where he got out of bed and went to sleep on the sofa. So much deliberate planning on his part and do much disrespect/disregard for you and your feelings and relationship. You may love this man but he doesnโt love/respect you the way you deserve to be loved and respected!! She will Always be in his life because they have a child together. What about 6 months from now when he is feeling nostalgic??? Girl, he is not worth all this pain. Save yourself and leave!!!
Yep, I met someone with a great personality but I just wasn't that physically attracted. I called it off within a few dates and felt awful because they were cool. But I didn't want to continue something through lying and would hurt a lot worse down the road.
Do you have a reason to have to keep communicating with him? If not, itโs done now.. heโs playing dumb, no explanation is needed.
I think this would mess things up in your relationship. If you're happy already, just leave it alone.
And I replied to that comment too, completely understanding your point.
She's remorseful now that he's getting married. How convenient.
I honestly donโt know. I want to give him the chance to change how he responds to my thoughts/feelings/insecurities/fears etc. but at the same time I really do think heโs too immature to actually be in a legit healthy relationship. Especially since I had to deal with getting the cold shoulder for 3 days straight over a cat
Yes, he's lazy and should understand by now that foreplay is often the most crucial part for women. If he doesn't understand that at 30, then you have to assume he doesn't have that much sexual experience or is just extremely selfish and only cares about using you for his own pleasure.
Make it clear to him that this is a major issue and that if he can't accommodate, then the relationship has no future.
It's one thing going soft because he isn't attracted to a specific sex act, its another not trying his best to make you sexually satisfied even by just using fingers tongue etc
That context is important. I think youโre more than likely fine. It really is a nice gesture and to be honest, when I brought up work, I wasnโt so much worried about getting made fun of for it. If heโs secure in himself, heโll essentially tell them to fuck off because whereโs the joke? The woman heโs dating got him delicious treats.
My worry on the work from was whether heโs in an environment where it would really be inappropriate. Youโd probably know if that was the case though, because heโd have alluded to it in one way or another.
Breathe easy. Youโre good.
I have talked to him multiple times. So many times. It will get better for like a few months and then go back to them not telling me they are together, that he is over her house or just telling me at the last minute that they are going out to lunch or something, not giving me time to arrange plans to be there with my work. I was thinking about counseling on the way to the bar. I love him so much and I know he loves me, it's just this one issue with this one person. He is my best friend. I want to feel like I'm his best friend too. I 110% no it's not sexual, and in some way I just feel like it's wrong for me to be upset about it… But I am.
No, you're missing the part where she's had to go with them to every doctor's appointment, every license renewal, and every other kind of in person thing they've ever had to act as a translator for them, since she was a small child, because they have been living in a country for 30+ years now without actually dealing with the language barrier themselves. They've made it OPs problem. They are not helpless, they've had decades to figure this out.
that is what i am thinking, like i love him but sometimes i wonder do i want to be in a relationship where my partner keeps upsetting me, but at the same time i feel like he is otherwise good so its a battle in my head
The only part where I disagree is the asking the kids if itโs okay. The 4 kids are under 4 years old.
You dont be okay with it. You might be his wife, but a woman is not an object. Despite what some men might think. You are a human and just because you are married, it does not mean you are his servant. I would not be okay. In fact, it would be instant divorce.
This guy isn't acting like a friend to you. Friends aren't consistently pushy and disrespectful, it really just sounds like he's waiting around hoping you'll eventually date him.
You can try to set boundaries all you want, but if he doesn't have any interest in changing his behavior, which it sounds like is the case, then it won't stop. If you want to end things in a somewhat non-confrontational way you could just let him know that his repeated behavior has made you uncomfortable and you don't think you're compatible as friends. You can have specific examples ready if you want, but if you've already talked to him about most of this then I don't think you owe him any more explanation.
Iโm sure you have a lot of nice reasons to stay together but based on your post she doesnโt sound like a keeper.