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Lillyth Eden, 37 y.o.
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Date: October 26, 2022
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I'd suggest you leave her, tbh. As soon as she didn't get what she wanted (for you to move in with her), she ran off and planned to cheat with her ex and tried to break up with you. Or maybe she did cheat and is just telling you otherwise now that it's done. There's no way she won't go running back to her ex again the next time you two have a disagreement.
Yeah, I agree. I think more information is needed. What happened that she suddenly doesn’t trust him to approach her without verbal consent? Has she been SA’d in the past and was triggered?
Haha yes he is single. I told him I don't have a problem with her saying anything because I prefer when women or potential partners err on the side of more communication than less.
So, lemme get this straight. You want to attend a driving course, but your gf said she'll break up with you if do anything without her? She sounds controlling.
Also, are driving classes mandatory where you're from? Can you not just take the driving test?
No. Don't have any of those.
Thank you. I appreciate it?
Oh my gosh!!! Leave him before he puts your life in danger!
My roommate went through this vetting process with his legitimate wife. They would study everyday for the questions. They would randomly quiz each other, 'what is my favorite toothpaste?, what do I eat for breakfast?, what kind of toilet paper do we us?'
I've been married 15 years and I would probably fail this test.
You were very young when you had him – he had a very different upbringing compared to his siblings.
Keep the door open.
I had an argument with my eldest when he was 15. Long story short, I rang his dad to come and collect him because his behaviour was unacceptable. That was the last day he spent at my house, and it was 7 years ago.
He was subsequently diagnosed with BPD. At the time his brother was still spending every second week with me, and I kept inviting him. I invited him for every event, sent him funny videos and memes, let him know my door was open.
For his 22nd birthday, he agreed to join me for dinner.
Your son appears to be having a reaction to his upbringing, but he’s possibly not yet mature enough to appreciate the position you were in at the time. He’s entitled to his space. All you can do is let him know the door is open.
I promise you I actually literally did say that ?? and if she literally responded with “k, cool” I promise you this post would be nonexistent. Bc it was an ACCIDENT.
And usually she does not take responsibility for her own actions and doesn’t apologize unless I apologize first.
You made the choice to forgive him and stay. You can't do that and then still bring it up. If you couldn't get over it then it's your responsibility to say that, and leave. Either stay and put it behind you, or let him know it was too much and you need out. But regardless of whether what he said was right or wrong, when you made up you told him basically “everything is ok” and it's not fair in that instance to bring it back up. Lets say you borrowed my car, the only thing I have of my deceased mother so there's emotional attachment present, and scratched it. I forgive you, but still bring it up all the time when you thought it was over and done with, forgiven, we made up etc etc etc. You get what I'm trying to say? You don't have to be ok with it, but don't fake it, because yes even he deserves to either be forgiven or let go, not emotionally toyed with whenever you think of what he said. Good luck.
Then you have a bf problem
OP, you deserve better! I know how it is to being an abuse victim and then stepping into and staying in other abusive situations BUT you deserve better.
If you have health insurance, I recommend seeing a therapist.
Were I come from that is theft! No matter who usees the money.
He is not perfect if he’s been cheating. Yes it’s a dealbreaker
I'm sorry but you don't know what love is. Love is mutual respect, love is understanding, love is choosing your partner first. Your partner doesn't love you, and you love the idea of your partner, not the actual person. The actual person is just like your father. He didn't look past your baggage, he just confronted you with the biggest piece of baggage and cared nothing about your opinion.
You have to first learn what love is, and love is choosing your wife over traditions.
I mean, I'm OK with the fact she is disabled. I don't care. It's the fact that the outlook for my life looks very restricted. I want to be spontaneous and travel etc etc which is very hot with my gf. And I would never message anyone whilst in a relationship or do anything else. Its just the grass looks greener with someone I have unresolved history which is making this situation even harder. As I have said before, nothing is wrong with my gf that she can change, it is literally just the fact she needs me to care for her. So breaking up would feel horrifically selfish.